Well played 2020, well played!
Who would've thought up the craziness these past seven months we have lived through would be real. Ravaged by fires, floods and now a crippling virus, it's enough to make you want to throw the towel in.
I haven't always been a reflective person - in fact - I never had been until four months ago. I was extremely reactive, defensive and highly emotional in almost every aspect of my life. I lived in scarcity, lack of, annoyance and victimhood. I allowed everything to control what happened to me and was not grateful for the life I had. I never had what others had, never felt what others felt. I allowed the fake Instagram world to influence my way of life and allowed it to change my thoughts and feelings about myself.
As a business owner who has a background in the corporate world, change was huge for me. I need a process, red tape and need to ask my management team fifty million questions in order to do anything. If it isn't on a agenda, a list or included as a KPI, then how am I meant to manage and be organised?
Our business is three years young and is one of my most proudest achievements. My hubby and I have ploughed through the doubters, those that said it wouldn't work and those that placed all their fears on us because of their past experiences. Col is the creative genius behind everything we do. The calm, the artist and the perfectionist. I'm the analytical, financial, organised OCD type. So clearly a match made in heaven.
People made so many judgements towards me last year when I, somewhat out of character, left my cushy corporate job, to take a backseat role in our business and support Col so he could fully embrace his true creative superpower. Time had come for us both to stop working at 1000%, and I was more than happy by that stage, to pay back the monumental support he had shown me.
It still is the best decision I ever made.
I stopped reading emails at 4am. I stopped the nightly conference calls while my overseas colleagues were awake. I stopped the international travel that placed me further away from my family than I had ever been before. I stopped letting people stand in front of me stealing my spotlight. I stopped being the bridesmaid. I stopped people from imposing their status on me to make themselves seem more important.
I stopped. I took a breath. I listened. I learned. I walked away and have never, ever looked back. Not once have I thought "maybe I'll just check in and see how they're going?".
I had realised I had taken my family and my support unit for granted for far too long. I started being there. Being present in their lives. I stopped feeling guilty if I didn't work 12 hours a day.
I connected with real life people. My support network grew. I made new friends (if you're a mum you know how hard this is!)
I became a nicer person and this changed my attraction to the world. I stopped attracting annoyed, frustrated, isolated people. I started attracting business women. Women who knew what they wanted. Women who would support and mentor you. Not try to take you down because they were intimidated by your amazingness!
Fast forward to March this year, the end of the festive period where I knew I needed to start working on the goals for 2020.
I was always too scared to announce my truest wishes, because
"People like us don't have those things"
"Are you sure you really want to do that?"
"You're not doing one of those things are you?" "But you're a mum, what does your family think?"
Hands up if you're nodding reading these four questions?
My entire life up until March this year was spent succumbing to people with these four opinions. I thought they were looking out for me. I now know this is their fears being placed on me, that has been holding me back all my (almost) 38 years.
In March, I was placed into the presence of a magnificent woman who I later on employed as a mentor and mindset coach. I invested money into her hands, and asked her to show me how to manifest everything I have on my vision board.
At this point, I needed a new challenge as I was venturing into my comfort zone where I would procrastinate and just stroll through everyday, being jealous of those achieving greatness, thinking that that stuff won't happen to me. I must be too broken and beyond repair to ever have the things they have.
Little did I know, that four months later, the skills I have learned, the facts I have discovered about myself, and the relationships that have formed and strengthened have been the factors that have changed my life beyond my wildest dreams.
No, I haven't won the lotto, I don't have stupid amounts of Christian Louboutin or Jimmy Choo's in my wardrobe and I am still driving my 10 year old Hyundai.
But my life is richer and I am the wealthiest I have ever been.
Wealth isn't just money. This is the first thing you need to change in your mindset. If you are trudging through your day saying "If I just had......", then you're in fact living in scarcity and will never ever have enough. You're standards are too high and your way too lazy to be brave enough to make the change.
My wealth is incredible. I now have the choice of how I spend my time, and more importantly, who I spend my time with. To me, having the freedom of time and choice is the most important wealth factor I know.
I no longer feel immense pressure to sit at a table with people who aren't encouraging of me. With people who want me to kiss their backsides and tell them how good they are. With people who want me to sit quietly and smile. With people who want me to do all their work while they sit and wait.
I now stand in the room, sit at the table, stand on the stage and announce to the world how important each day we have is. That being grateful for the work you do, the connections you make and how you make people feel is the best thing in the world.
I have created my own table, my own stage and my own luxury house, where I welcome women to sit with me, to share their stories with me. I help these women rise to demand more. Demand to be seen. To feel better and healthier in their own skin.
Helping women feel their best physically and mentally is the best advertisement for my brand that I can get. Consumers don't buy the product you sell, they buy you! You're intentions, your branding, your trust. They buy the feeling you make them feel after you've spent time with them.
The women on my team no longer feel anxious about their day, they have more energy than ever before. They glow. They feel safe and have comfort knowing I have their back. They aren't alone to wander through their day. They have direction and are challenged to grow! I teach them skills on how to grow their business, their way, in whatever time they have. Even if it is just 15 minutes in a day!
You can't wait for the diamond encrusted platter to arrive on your doorstep just because you have a picture of it on your wall.
Get up, tie your hair up, grab a coffee and do the work.
Great things never come from comfort - but they do come to those wanting to challenge their current situation.
Things happen to you - or - for you.
Which will you be accepting today?